To psychologists, purpose is an abiding intention to achieve a long-term goal that is both personally meaningful and makes a positive mark on the world. More simply, purpose is quite similar to the Japanese concept of ikigai, your reason to get out of bed each morning.
Ephesians 2:10 in the New Living Translation tells us that every one of us is God’s masterpiece, a work of art. “For we are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.
Essentially, we are created on purpose, for a purpose. Do you know what your purpose is?
What Is Your Purpose?
It may not be the same throughout your entire life. As we grow and develop new skills, our purpose may shift to take better advantage of those skills. When we don’t know our purpose, our lives can become full of despair.
An Alabama pastor friend told me the story of Jamice, a woman in her 70s, still vital and energetic who would have told anyone who asked that her purpose was to care for her husband and his chronic illness that kept him homebound and unable to do many of the hobbies he had previously done. She doted on him, making sure he got his medications on time, helped him do his exercises, put on TV for his weekly favorite shows, and brought out their photo albums so they could reminisce about their lives together. But then, he died and she lost her purpose, her ikigai.
For months, her church family visited, sent meals, and even sent occasional “care” packages with a book by one of her favorite authors, a CD with previous worship services, and handwritten notes and cards expressing their love for her. When they visited, they often found her still in her pajamas sitting in her husband’s beloved recliner. Her church friends grew so concerned, they met to think about how they could do something to bring her back to life—getting out of the house, having lunch with friends, volunteering at the library.
As they talked, one small voice piped up saying, “We are so busy caring for Janice but I think what she really needs is to know she is needed. I know when I visit, I have been loathe to talk about some of challenges I am facing because I thought Janice didn’t need any more concerns on her plate. But I wonder if that is part of the problem. Janice told me she doesn’t know why God is keeping her alive. She is so ready to pass so she can be with her husband. What can we do to help Janice find a reason to still be alive?
They discussed a number of ideas but one person remembered reading a study about how caring for even a houseplant can help to give someone purpose. Someone else mentioned Janice had such a strong prayer life that perhaps they could give her a weekly prayer list of people and situations. Someone else mentioned they could give her an assortment of greeting cards and some stamps so she could be sending cards to people for whom she was praying. Everyone present may a commitment to be more open and vulnerable in asking Janice for advice.
My friend said the difference was amazing. Six months later Janice was back in church but even more importantly, she was an active member of the prayer team and the Congregational Care team. Janice had found new purpose and she was bringing light and hope to others.
Thinking About My Reason For Being
For the last five years I have been in a time of transition after my previous employment abruptly ended. So I have been thinking a lot about this idea of ikigai, my reason for being. I have been reading and working my way through a book by Amanda Kudo, “My Little Ikigai Journal”. With more than 120 pages of questions for self-reflection, creative exercises, and inspirational quotes, the author’s stated purpose is to guide the reader to their unique ikigai. I’m still working through the book but already feel comfortable in giving it a big thumbs up.
If you remember the show Ally McBeal (1997-2002), she often had a “theme song” running through her head related to the emotional challenge she was facing. My current theme song is Natasha Bedingfield’s Unwritten.
The chorus includes the lyrics:
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten.
I am grateful for the spirit of hope that tells me that at 64 years old, I still have more to my story that is still unwritten. May you identify your purpose and connect with the divine purpose of sharing joy and hope with the world.
For Reflection (either individually or with a group)
Read the blog. Read it a second time, maybe reading it aloud or asking someone else to read it aloud so you can hear it with different intonation and emphases. Invite the Divine to open your heart to allow the light of new understanding to pierce the shadows of embedded assumptions, stereotypes, and ways of thinking so that you may live more abundantly. Then spend some time with the following questions together with anything or anyone who helps you reflect more deeply.
- What is your ikigai, or reason for getting out of bed each morning?
- As that been true for many years or have you experienced a transition in your life’s purpose?
- How does your purpose bring joy and hope to others?
Download a pdf including the Reflection Questions to share and discuss with friends, family, or members of your faith community small group.
To learn more about options for post-retirement success and how to begin preparing even prior to finishing your primary career, join us in person or online for the 2024 Abundant Aging Symposium, Purpose, Meaning and Redefining Retirement on October 4th. Discounts on registration before September 9th.
