As we age, we become part of many communities, whether we actively participate in them or simply exist within them.
Our first introduction to community is family, perhaps neighborhood friends and classmates at school. These are simple relationships, as a child, maintaining them is easy. Of course, our relationship with family may change over time and we may no longer talk to our childhood friends, but these early relationships allow us to how to engage with others.
For me, that early understanding of community came naturally. I’ve always been an extroverted person who enjoys being around people. As a child, I didn’t struggle to make friends at the park or when I went away to summer camp. Though as I got older it became harder to maintain those relationships and I was hurt when I wasn’t included in certain spaces. It was disheartening because I was friendly and eager to find a place where I belonged, yet it was difficult to form those lasting connections. I was often told that I would find my people with time. Eventually, I came to understand that community isn’t always constant.
“Community isn’t built once and kept. It arrives in seasons.”
That idea has stayed with me because community rarely grows in just one way. Community can find you like a weed, unexpected and in odd places. Or it can grow like a tree, over time. It can bloom and the leaves can fall; we can lose our community. But then another season comes and we’re given the opportunity to grow with each other again.
For me, the next season of community came through the activities and spaces I chose to be part of. In my teenage years, I was more involved with after-school activities. Everything from sports, theater, and student government to working at the grocery store. In being very active in certain spaces, I spent a lot of time with people that enjoyed the things that I enjoyed and I met the people who became my circle. I found friends who I could laugh with for hours, who understood me and who challenged me. With time, I was able to make those lasting connections.
As I’ve grown older, I’ve stepped into more spaces, each different from the one before and all coming with their own experiences. In college, I joined Delta Phi Epsilon Sorority (Go Deephs!), which gave me a safe space to grow academically, socially, professionally, and personally while also engaging in philanthropy with the greater community.
Each of these experiences taught me not only how meaningful community can be, but also how important it is to make others feel welcomed within it. Because of my early experiences, I now find deep satisfaction in helping foster inclusive spaces where others can feel safe, welcomed, and seen. I strive to foster abundant community that allows space for learning, introspection, vulnerability, connection, and creativity. Giving others the time and opportunity to be themselves in a place they know will welcome them with open arms. I know what it feels like to want connection and not always know where to find it, which is why creating room for others matters so much to me.
Soon, I’ll have the opportunity to volunteer with youth in my community, and in many ways, it feels like giving back to the younger version of myself who craved community. I'll have the opportunity to mentor and guide while creating a safe space for fun and creativity for these youth. It is a reminder that community is not only something we receive; it is something we help build for others.
"Build community by being community."
